Wednesday, January 20, 2010

I put the attitude in gratitude

I want to thank those people who have read and commented on my blog. It is much appreciated and I hope for this blog to evolve into a forum where more of you add your thoughts and bare your souls. I'd like this blog to eventually become more of a dialogue than a monologue.

That said, today's blog is one made up of odds and ends -

Something has really been bothering me lately. I fail to understand why in 2010 women still feel the need to lie about their sexual history to seem 'virginal' to men. I think women who are 'experienced' are fantastic. I would much rather have someone tell me theyve had many partners than a handful. The reason is that when someone has had a few partners (unless theyve fucked each of them a thousand times), it really shows in the bedroom, leading me to move on - life is too short for lame sex. Experience counts! A healthy sex drive is healthy. Women, stop lying about your mileage! It is unbecoming.

Fake handbags. Seriously? Stop the madness!

Girls who stop giving head the second spunk starts spraying - take some pride in your bloody work! That bad habit is why Ive just started fucking my girlfriend in the mouth rather than having her give head. And I know shes not the only one, I'm looking at you lazy DC girls!

I dont hesitate to pee in the shower if the urge strikes me. You do too. You just won't admit it. I will, I'd pee in your shower too.

I fly fairly often. I have no desire to join the mile high club. With how small airplane bathrooms are nowadays, there's no room to have a proper fuck. Also, Id die of claustrophobia.

Whats with the guys with the tight pants? More importantly, why is it the guys with tiny twitches that always wear the tight pants? Less is not more little boys. Also, if you're a male with nipple rings, you're gay. Im just saying...

I've got the Vikings to win it all, since my team - the Steelers - sucked a big fat one this year. Favre is a pimp.

Speaking of pimps, what happened to the girls who use what they have to get what they want? The IT girls nowadays dont know what their predecessors did. Thats for damn sure.

I gamble. I dont encourage anyone else to do it, but Ive had amazing dumb luck. Picked the steelers to win it all last year. Picked the celts in six a couple of years ago. Have an amazing record in boxing matches. In the NFL playoffs - I have Indianapolis beating the Jets. Vikings beating New Orleans. Let's see how I do. If I'm wrong, it means I paid for that error (quite literally).

Do people really think Pepsi and Coke are interchangable? Theyre not. When I say, can I have a coke and the waiter/waitress/stripper says "Pepsi ok"? I respond "No, it sucks. I'll have water."

If you're going to have tan lines, make sure they come from a small bathing suit. Hear me now thank me later. The brazilians have the bikinis and tan lines down if you are looking for inspiration. Speaking of brazilians, get the wax. Every woman with a bf/husband/fuckbuddy/fwb/one night stand MUST get the brazilian at least once so he can die having lived a full life.

World cup 2010. Get ready.

6 comments:

  1. This is true except for the nipple ring.

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  2. Fuck the vikings.

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  3. It is over for the Vikings my man. I agree with the comment about the DC girls, swallowers are great finds in the DMV.

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  4. personally a Pepsi gal when i cant get it I mix coke and sprite. gets pretty cloooooose. will sometimes.

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  5. The Brazillian is a must.

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