Freaking Vikes!

Ok, that sucked. I went 1/2 this weekend. Colts won, and I got royally fkd by the Vikings with no lube. Colts made me money, Vikes lost me more. Dont ever gamble! Speaking of which, if you're going to gamble, dont lose money on the Jets because you think Sanchez is cute (im looking at you dolly)

The reader who made the comment "fuck the Vikings", you were so right. I've seen the error of my ways and Im with you! They pissed that game down their leg and favre didnt play like the pimp he is. I wont bore you with my armchair qb recap of all the stupid pee wee league football errors the Vikes made (12 men on the field. REALLY??? is this the fucking nfl?) and won't whine about crappy calls. I will say that Im disappointed that the favre/vikes story didn't end with the super bowl win. The clock definitely struck midnight.

Which leads us to the Superbowl. Colts vs Saints. No brainer. Dont get emotional with this one. If you're going to get emotional, keep your money in your pocket.

Speaking of getting emotional, I saw a girl with a seahawks logo tattooed on her shoulder. Fucking why? I wont get into it now..but whats with all the lame tattoos in lame locations? Its an epidemic. More on tats and pierces later.

more on backdoor

I enjoy anal (GIVING anal... so there is no confusion) from time to time. I'm not the only one who does, so dont give me that look. From time to time I have run into women who enjoy it as well. Women dont need to tell me they like anal, I know it from a little sure fire test that I do while fucking the pussy. If you've been with me, you've had the test done to you. Some have passed, some have failed and some who swear up and down they hate anal, have passed the test, and taken it in the ass while pretending to protest. I'll talk about the sure fire test at a later date.

The purpose of this blog is to talk to the dickheads that ruin anal for all men that are with a woman after they are. These are the dicks that result in a woman giving you the "Ive tried it before, and I hate it, it hurts". As soon as I hear that, I know HE has been with her. Who is HE? He is the jackass that thinks the ass is supposed to be fucked like a pussy. HE just likes to stick his cock in the ass with no preparation, no lube and fuck it hard like its a pussy until he cums. As a result of that stupid strategy, SHE will stop having anal and every guy who comes after HIM will not be getting any anal...EVER. So, here is my public service announcement - the ASS is not supposed to be fucked like a pussy. If you dont know how to fuck ass properly, DONT DO IT. Everything is not for everybody! IF you want to fuck an ass, learn how to do it, before you ruin it for every man that is going to follow you with your ignorant anal technique.

On a related note, there is NO reason a woman shouldnt have sex while on her period. If youre not woman enough to take it in the pussy while youre on your period (spare us the 'its mess' lameness), that does NOT mean your bf/fuckbuddy/fwb/husband etc should lose a week of fucking. God, in his infinite wisdom, blessed you with THREE holes for a reason.

I put the attitude in gratitude

I want to thank those people who have read and commented on my blog. It is much appreciated and I hope for this blog to evolve into a forum where more of you add your thoughts and bare your souls. I'd like this blog to eventually become more of a dialogue than a monologue.

That said, today's blog is one made up of odds and ends -

Something has really been bothering me lately. I fail to understand why in 2010 women still feel the need to lie about their sexual history to seem 'virginal' to men. I think women who are 'experienced' are fantastic. I would much rather have someone tell me theyve had many partners than a handful. The reason is that when someone has had a few partners (unless theyve fucked each of them a thousand times), it really shows in the bedroom, leading me to move on - life is too short for lame sex. Experience counts! A healthy sex drive is healthy. Women, stop lying about your mileage! It is unbecoming.

Fake handbags. Seriously? Stop the madness!

Girls who stop giving head the second spunk starts spraying - take some pride in your bloody work! That bad habit is why Ive just started fucking my girlfriend in the mouth rather than having her give head. And I know shes not the only one, I'm looking at you lazy DC girls!

I dont hesitate to pee in the shower if the urge strikes me. You do too. You just won't admit it. I will, I'd pee in your shower too.

I fly fairly often. I have no desire to join the mile high club. With how small airplane bathrooms are nowadays, there's no room to have a proper fuck. Also, Id die of claustrophobia.

Whats with the guys with the tight pants? More importantly, why is it the guys with tiny twitches that always wear the tight pants? Less is not more little boys. Also, if you're a male with nipple rings, you're gay. Im just saying...

I've got the Vikings to win it all, since my team - the Steelers - sucked a big fat one this year. Favre is a pimp.

Speaking of pimps, what happened to the girls who use what they have to get what they want? The IT girls nowadays dont know what their predecessors did. Thats for damn sure.

I gamble. I dont encourage anyone else to do it, but Ive had amazing dumb luck. Picked the steelers to win it all last year. Picked the celts in six a couple of years ago. Have an amazing record in boxing matches. In the NFL playoffs - I have Indianapolis beating the Jets. Vikings beating New Orleans. Let's see how I do. If I'm wrong, it means I paid for that error (quite literally).

Do people really think Pepsi and Coke are interchangable? Theyre not. When I say, can I have a coke and the waiter/waitress/stripper says "Pepsi ok"? I respond "No, it sucks. I'll have water."

If you're going to have tan lines, make sure they come from a small bathing suit. Hear me now thank me later. The brazilians have the bikinis and tan lines down if you are looking for inspiration. Speaking of brazilians, get the wax. Every woman with a bf/husband/fuckbuddy/fwb/one night stand MUST get the brazilian at least once so he can die having lived a full life.

World cup 2010. Get ready.

Haiti!

We've all seen the heartbreaking images from Haiti. Haiti and Haitians, who were already suffering from numerous challenges including extreme poverty are being further tested by a huge natural disaster. Please provide financial support for Haitian relief efforts through the relief agency of your choice. At a minimum, please keep Haiti and all Haitians in your prayers. One world.

Me to my very hungover gf

"I need for you to 'come' to my staff meeting." Her - "huh". Me - "Bend over so I can introduce you to my staff." Not quite the hit I was expecting it to be. Today will be a long day.

5 inch heels

are not for everybody! This is the public service announcement that somebody had to make, looks like it will have to be me. If I see one more female trying to do something thats not meant for her, teetering around on 5 inch heels like a circus clown on stilts, I am going to have to personally tell her to cut it out, take them off on the spot, and walk home barefoot. 5 inch heels are sexy, true. They definitely have an "id like to fuck her with just those heels on" element to them, true. Every female should own a pair, NOT TRUE! So for those females who should NOT be wearing 5 inch heels, and you know who you are (and if you dont know, someone who loves you should tell you immediately!), save those for your bf in the comfort of your own bedroom so the rest of us don't have to suffer. For those women who SHOULD be wearing 5s, , continue as you were please. And lastly, 6s are the new 5s. For those superstars - you know who are - rock the 6s. But only do the 5s, 5.5s and especially the 6s if you are up to the task. Midgets dont play in the nba, Rupaul doesnt like pussy, Good girls dont spit, Chinese men dont do porn...i.e. Everything is not for everybody. P.S. And if you're going to wear the 5-6 inch heels, don't cry about your bunions like a little bitch (I'm looking at you Posh Spice!)

It comes from my soul...

When I thought about starting this blog, I asked my gf one question...is the blogging world ready for me? While I dont really remember her answer because we were in the midst of an argument about her being a fn asshole, I've decided to take the plunge because I need an outlet for my soul. My soul - thats where this will all come from.

Here's what you can expect when I can get the login and password from the gf and actually sign on and write (and if she doesnt change my password and jack my blog like she did to my facebook and gmail account) - You'll get an unedited, unscripted, uncensored, stream of consciousness that will make you say "is this guy for fucking real?", "did he just say that?", "is that even legal?" or "is that even possible?" or sometimes, "he's full of shit!"

Topics I will cover in future posts will include, but not be limited to, fashion from a straight man's viewpoint, sports, trannys, masturbation, work, sex, family, random thoughts on people - famous, infamous, and wanna bes, implants, porn, online crap, slutwhores, the concept of whore ignore, one night stands, why pussy maintenance is critical, boxing (pacquiao will spank mayweather like rented ass - bet on it!), movies, drinks, how many illegal drugs my gf was using the night I met her, music and more generally, mi vida loca.With that I begin this journey of sharing my soul...and maybe some of my gf's naked pictures.